GROWING UP, THE NEXT STEP (PART II) / SNAP, CRACKLE, AND POP ARE HIPSTERS

when it gets late, and i need something semi substantial to munch on, i reach for rice krispies. they weigh almost nothing, and might actually be made of almost nothing. this usually meets the qualifications for what i'm looking for in the late hours, fast, delicious, and won't make me feel like a fat slob. this is one of the better cereals to boost up to the next level with toppings, and i love getting creative with the possibilities of my bowl of krispies. although quite possibly the noisiest/most annoying cereal in existence (don't bring it to the office, or into a quiet movie watching session). i want to highlight some of these toppings, because it almost makes it a different cereal.

-honey (optional cinnamon): this is my go to for krispies. a little sweetness mixed up makes this cereal taste amazing. add cinnamon and it is like i poured my cereal into a big bowl of horchata.
-bananas: slice. that. shit. up.
-frozen berries: gives the milk a good flavor (and can make it pink), keeps the cereal extra cold, and tastes amazing.
-in yogurt: this is something i just recently tried, but was really into. adding granola to yogurt is one of my all time faves, but krispies in yogurt gives it a nice texture, while still letting you appreciate the flavor of the yogurt itself. i'm a big fan.

also want to shout out snap, crackle and pop in this post, their mascot recognition is up there with the legends, they have been joked about by mitch hedberg, and family guy among others. they have been around for ages (the 1930's according to wikipedia). Over the years of their look has evolved, but one theme has remained: they dress like gigantic hipsters. Snap has that mid 2000's hipster bandana look going on that was ever popular while i was in college, crackle's beanie look dangerously close to completely falling off of his head and i think he might be wearing some for of a bow-tie, and pop might be wearing some form of 19th century military jacket and horse riding pants. in fact, i actually think i saw someone wearing the exact same outfit as Pop at a los angeles club a few years ago. and he was one of the hippiest looking fuckers in the whole place.

GROWING UP, THE NEXT STEP (PART I)

i'm an adult now. or so i like to tell myself. even though i may be the anti-adult adult, i can delude myself for a short time into thinking i am a productive member of society during breakfast. i do this by avoiding starting my day with a cereal that 2 of the 3 main ingredients are some form of sugar/corn syrup. now i do love the sweet stuff. but i don't want diabetes. luckily my tastes are evolving, and even more lucky is that cereal companies are starting to realize that healthy =/= shitty tasting. cereals high in fiber and whole grains are getting better everyday and i am so pleased with that. here is one of my favorites:

smart start.

antioxidants. strong heart. vitamins. all the crap your mom tried to make you eat in a breakfast cereal, but you never wanted to because a lot of those cereals sucked. you don't have to eat grape nuts to not feel shitty about your cereal choices. we are living in the 21st century. we have a black president. we can have a good tasting cereal that doesn't lead to cavities and obese children. this cereal seriously kills it. oh and oat clusters. god i LOVE oak clusters. i want to scream it from the highest mountain tops! every cereal should just throw in some oat clusters. i wouldn't even care. it would make ever cereal better. seriously. think about it. the smart start line has some other cereals i haven't had yet that i'm sure are just as good. this cereal is an example of the beautiful dance between health and flavor that is a joy to eat. you finish eating and think: "wait, that was actually good for me?"

also i want to give a shoutout to my friend brook tarbet on her birthday. i wrote these two posts for her because she loves this blog and is very enthusiastic about me continuing it. she is a wonderful friend and i hope she had a lovely birthday. she is now part of this blog forever.

TOP 4 CEREALS TO EAT DRY (NO MILKS)

im a busy guy. or so i like to tell myself. i get hungry and i want cereal, but i gotta go get my hustle on and i have no time to pour a bowl. a ziplock bag is just as good as a bowl if you know what cereal to put in it, to keep your belly satisfied. these are my top 4 favorite cereals to much on the go:

oh yeah and that's right. top 4. you read that correctly. no one does top 4. top 3, top 5..fuck that. 4.

1. frosted mini wheats. now the only downside to this one, is that they are dry as the sahara in july. insta-cotton mouth. but. coffee exists. and a mouthful of mini wheats washed down with a good cup of joe is a great combination. the sweet frosting and the dry cereal (and subsequent mouth) are met with the warm bitter of the coffee in a excellent manner. washes down and leaves you feeling satisfied. if you are a coffee free person, hot cocoa offers a similar (albeit sweeter) experience.

2. life. it's light, it's sweet, it's crunchy, it's awesome. you can even see the damn sugar crystals embedded in the cereal if you look close enough. science in action. as a kid i like the cinnamon variety better, but my tastes have matured and im back to the OG life as my go to buy. "hey clarkey, he likes it." you bet your ass i do.

3. reese's puffs. can't leave these off the list. damn i love this cereal. best "dessert" cereal. which is no surprise considering it is 'candy for breakfast.' i used to beg and beg my mom to buy it for me as a kid. when she bought it my siblings and i would devour the box in one saturday sitting, but before we could have any we had to have a bowl of 'healthy' cereal first. those were the days. the thick peanut butter or chocolate coating that you can taste on every piece..and then it gets all stuck in your teeth and you pick it out all morning, and you love every little morsel.

4. oatmeal squares. can't leave these off the list. it is my favorite dry cereal, and one of my favorites overall. first, the coffee thing mentioned earlier also applies with this cereal 100%. second, i didn't think it possible, but they are actually fun to eat. a dry cereal? try and follow me on this. you know how people nibble the ends of a reese's cup, or bite around a baby carrot until and that is left is that weird core thing? you can do a similar kind of maneuver with this cereal. you can bite off rows at a time,and kind of eat it in chunks and it won't fall apart like other cereals do. this shit has layers or something and its actually an enjoyable way to eat this cereal. that was the first thing that came to my mind when i thought of eating oatmeal squares dry. sitting in class or on the couch or on the bus and taking the time to bite every piece in half. or in thirds. and loving every bite.

I WOKE UP TODAY INSPIRED TO REVISIT THIS BLOG. THIS WAS MY MOTIVATION:

YEP. i did pick the largest picture on the planet. on purpose. and yes, i haven't posted on this blog in almost 2 years, but today i felt like i had to. why? well partially because i need more productive hobbies in my life, and i really enjoyed doing this blog before, and also because THIS CEREAL IS SO DAMN GOOD. i could not live another day without shouting to the heavens above how much joy it brings me to eat this cereal.

guys. seriously guys. like, guys listen, seriously. guys, listen. this cereal guys. listen. the most underrated cereal ever guys. it's blowing my mind how good this stuff is, and almost no one knows it.

all joking aside, talk about a well rounded cereal. without milk it makes a great snack for on-the-go. throw a few handfuls in a baggie; you won't regret it. perfect size for dry eating, awesome texture, sweet enough, but without being overkill (9 grams of sugar per serving). I would safely say that if you were going to eat a cereal dry, this one would be the best dry cereal you could ever eat. Very healthy, high in fiber and whole grains (Quaker holding it DOWN). You won't feel guilty if you eat a whole box in a few days.

then you add the milk. oh man. and it becomes this perfect crunchy-yet kinda soft consistency that is just unreal. when i eat this cereal, i enter a kind of blind daze where i just eat, and eat without thinking or realizing how quickly i'm eating until it's all gone. only when i'm staring at an empty bowl do i realize the state of total bliss that this cereal just put me in. this cereal has creeped into my top 5 all time list over the past few weeks, and might be in my top 3 all time. it comes in 3 flavors: brown sugar (my favorite and the most traditional flavor), cinnamon (also awesome), and golden maple (which i think is new). any would be a great pickup. keep it in mind the next time you are at the grocery.

ps- I'm hoping that i'll being doing this more often, there are some new cereals out that i have my eye on. i'll tweet/update my friends on any further posts (which i am planning on doing. pinky swear)

As always, Thank you for your support.

Cereal is Life Staff.

THE DANGERS OF CEREAL: THE CEREAL GODS GIVETH. THE CEREAL GODS TAKETH.

hey kids, just a quick message from your friends at cereal is life letting you know that cereal can be dangerous, so you should watch yourself. although cereal is my cruel mistress, i did say she was cruel. she can take a bite out of your life, as much as you bite her(that was pretty good right?)

-your wallet: let's face it, cereal is expensive, 1 $3 box a week will run you 156 bucks a year. OUCH. that's not even covering you fancy organic granola people, and the addicts like myself who can easily consume 2 boxes a week if we're not careful. that adds up, so my advice: watch for sales, try off brands, or eat toast for breakfast sometimes, it won't kill ya.

-your mouth: whenever i bring up captain crunch, some clown decides to be funny and throw in a "tears up the roof of your mouth, bro" yeah sure. maybe for some, but my mouth has been conditioned to withstand the roughest of cereals. but this guy has a point. some cereals(kashi go-lean crunch par example) is tough as nails and could make for a less enjoyable consumption. my advice: let SOME cereals(at your discretion) sit for a sec before eating.

-making you late for the bus: oh wait that was me the other night. damn you 5 boxes for $5 sale. i had to walk home carrying my groceries. cereal, my love for you carries too much weight. my advice: get a car. FML

-your bowels: i have a friend *cough*maxwell*cough* who eats like 4 bowls or raisin bran a day. now i love raisin bran, and it's ability to keep you regular, but that guys spends all damn day on the toilet. advice: watch your bran consumption.

and max, sorry bud, for the "shout out". i don't think he reads this anyways.

IT'S BEEN TOO LONG. SORRY.

just wanted to make a quick update, after 5 months. I have been eating less cereal lately due to my finances, and so the blog has been suffering. But i have a few cereal/blog related things to say:

First and foremost, HUGE shoutout and love to my friends, their friends, and everyone who reads this. The Hendershot family especially. apparently wade and blair sent this link to their whole family. Awesome. Thanks for reading. Now some cereal liner notes:

1. Great Value(read: Wal-Mart) now sells a cereal like raisin bran crunch. I've only had a few bites, but it is really cheap, and I approve. Look out for that.
2. Golden Grahams are so underrated. Man, I really forgot how much I love them.
3. Pebbles makes a like Confetti, cupcake flavored cereal now, its pretty good, i actually really like it, but it isn't cake-ey enough. Once you add milk it tastes just like Rice Krispie Treats cereal(which is one of the BEST ever). I need cereal innovators to make new things, not just rehash and steal something that exists and put it in a new box. Come on. At least make taste like cupcake batter, ya'll are just getting lazy.
4. Within the next week, look for 2 more updates. i bought some cereal, and i have stuff to say.

Thanks again,

Lots of Love,

Cereal Is Life Staff

THIS. IS. SHIT.

I WENT TO SMITH'S MARKETPLACE YESTERDAY TO GET SOME CEREAL. I BOUGHT SOME OFF-BRAND HONEY BUNCHES OF OATS WITH STRAWBERRIES. THIS IS WHAT I GOT.


NOTICE ANYTHING WEIRD ABOUT THIS BAG??

I DO.

THERE IS NOT A SINGLE DAMN STRAWBERRY IN THE WHOLE THING. WTF SMITH'S MARKETPLACE! YOU SCREWED ME. YOU SON OF A BITCH! YOU SCREWED ME.

YOU BETTER BELIEVE I WILL EAT MOST OF EACH BAG THEN TAKE THEM BACK FOR A REFUND. SUCK IT SMITH'S.