I've been reviewing cereals for over 12 years now

When I was 8, at a trip to Universal Studios in Florida, a an on the sidewalk asked me if i wanted to try some cereals, and give him my opinion of them. I have some alphabets cereal with marshmallows, and some lucky charms, and told him which i liked more and why. From what i remember i liked the alphabets cereal, telling him it was crunchier and i liked that i could spell things. i received a check in my mailbox about 3 weeks after my vacation for $5 from the cereal people for my input.

i need to figure out a way to make some money off this again.

RIP

i know you're in heaven smiling down on me.

I HATE LITTLE KIDS IN CEREAL COMMERICALS PART 1

WHY are little kids in cereal commercials such little brats. What is the world coming to? I give you my first piece of evidence:

(STARTS AT 30 SECONDS)


HE EVENS ASKS NICELY "MAY I HAVE SOME". AND THEY SAY NO. WTF.

THEN HE TELLS EVERYONE HOW DEPRESSED HE IS "AND I'M SADDER THAN EVER" AND THEY STILL WON'T POUR HIM A BOWL. WHAT KIND OF PARENTING IS GOING ON HERE?

They won't share their trix, just because he is a Rabbit(HATE CRIMES??) and they make this poor Rabbit depressed. Is it too much for these kids to just let him have some?! SILLY RABBIT TRIX ARE FOR KIDS HAHAHAHA F*CK YOU!

i'm never having kids.

HONEYCOMB, THE LIGHT BEER OF CEREALS

I really like Honeycomb. Everything about eating it I enjoy, except for the fact that I have to fill up a trough tp get enough cereal. IT JUST WILL NOT FILL ME UP. When I bought the box I am currently eating, I was so stoked that it was so big, and it was only 2 bucks. Unfortunately the cereal is so light you HAVE to eat 2-3 bowls, or fill up a giant tupper-ware(this is no joke i do this) to have a filling breakfast. So now, I thought I was getting a good deal, but this big box is emptying quickly. Which is why I say Honeycomb:

For the great taste that won't fill you up...HONEYCOMB.

THE HIPPIES FINALLY GOT SOMETHING RIGHT

Today I have to stop bagging on hippies and 'granola' people in general. They finally started pulling their weight in this world and I cannot be happier with what they have produced. I may even join their ranks, and after you try this cereal you may want to hop on the bandwagon. So put on your hiking boots, stop shaving, grab your backpack and pack a bowl....of this delicious Trail Mix Crunch Cereal; Cranberry Vanilla style. I tried this cereal by the grace of my roommate who bought a double pack at Sam's club and let me have some(thanks Jer) and I was VERY VERY impressed.

First off the box was like 10 pounds. No Joke. This is one of the heaviest cereals ever, which translates to me into being filling cereal and it definitely sticks with you for longer than most cereals. This cereal combines a granola style cereal plus almond slices, and is mixed with clusters like you might find in Honey Bunches of Oats. Plus you get some dehydrated cranberries in the mix. The flavor is straight up vanilla, but it isn't an overbearing flavor, allowing the vanilla and the cranberry flavors to mix quite nicely. The mixture of the cranberries, the clusters, the vanilla, and the milk just is fantastic. Great texture, great flavor. Plus it is good to just grab a handfull for a little snack, which always rules. This is one of my favorite new cereals. I am stoked on it. In fact i may even have a bowl right now.

I think i am going to change my major to landscape architecture, grow some dreds and date a girl named Sage.

LIES LIES LIES

The new Apple Jacks advertising campaign bring in to question whether Apples, or Cinnamon is the commanding flavor of this cereal. In the commercial, they the proclaim that "CinnaMon(the rasta cinnamon stick character) knows that kids love the sweet cinnamon taste of Apple Jacks". It's not called cinnamon jacks. WTF. So I look on the side of the box, both Apple Juice concentrate and Cinnamon are key ingredients. So who do i choose? I just really don't know. So i eat a few bowls. I am still torn. Then I take another look at the box and realize:

A) This cereal is really bad for me
B) The main ingredient, in front of any grain(and FAR above apples or cinnamon) is SUGAR.

After having a few more bowls i realize this cereal just tastes like sugar. At this point I am instantly bummed. Apple and CinnaMon have no chance here. they are back 10-15 ingredients on this box. The Sugar in Apple Jacks overpowers the taste of anything else, and after a few more bowls, i realized that this cereal isn't nearly as good as i thought it was when i was a kid. I am actually a bit let down. If you like to eat crunchy sugar O's then disregard this and eat up. If you want a cereal that truly mixes the Delicious flavors of Apples and Cinnamon....then PLEASE buy some Apple Cinnamon Cheerios. They are so much better tasting. SIGH. Lied to again.

PS-My box didn't have a cool Xbox toy either.

CEREAL COMIC BOOK

Breakfast of the Gods.

Very funny. Extremely Clever. Check it out. Another update this week. I promise.



http://www.webcomicsnation.com/poyorick/botg/series.php?view=archive&chapter=10960
http://www.webcomicsnation.com/poyorick/botg2/series.php?view=archive&chapter=19415
http://www.webcomicsnation.com/poyorick/botg3/series.php?view=archive&chapter=28604